When I got
married over 27 years ago, I was under the impression marriage should be a
50/50 thing... give and take... 50/50. I had expectations of how the
relationship should work... we need to meet each other halfway. Right? WRONG! It
isn't just with marriage either... it can spread to any of our relationships
with family and friends.
Live
with expectancy not expectations!
Expectations
bring disappointment,
Expectancy
can bring miracles!
It didn't take
long before I realized doing “50/50” just was not going to work! By trying to do life that way, I was putting
conditions on my love for the other person, which led to disappointment and
frustration... 50/50 says "I'll do my part and you do your part"...
it bases love on performance. We get more concerned with what the other person
is giving rather than what we are giving. How could I ever judge what is my 50%
or my husband's 50%... when I look at it like that I see I am trying to build a
foundation all on my feelings... love isn't a feeling... love is an action...
it's a choice. Like the choice God made when He sent His Son to die for each of
us. God has always and will always give us 100 percent. Truthfully, I know I
never even deserve 10% of His love... yet He pours His love out on me in
abundance.“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” ~ Romans 5:8
Now, it is your turn… will you try to work on changing your marriage relationship to 100/100... in fact, how about trying it with all your relationships… even that person that gets on your nerves? Not saying it is easy... and honestly it will never be 100/100... some days it might be 80/100 or 75/100... we are just human, but it gives us a goal to strive for each day. I know for me… I am a work in progress! It cannot be done through our own strength but through the strength that comes from a life totally yielded to Christ.
I have had single friends say, "I am just trying to find a half-way decent guy." I have probably even said this before myself. Think about that... a half-way decent guy... or a half-way decent anything??? Why would we be willing to settle for "half-way decent" instead of all the way decent!!!??? Half-way decent means half-way not decent! I want more than that! How about you? Are you settling at the half-way point?
A little
respect and loving kindness can go a long way… making just a small effort to
reach out to others is a big deal! Half-way is never enough! Every act of
kindness will be water to a thirsty soul. As Believers we are called to be light in this
dark world, so whether our spouse or friends or family are Believers or not…
they need to see that our words and actions bear witness to the Love we have
living inside of us.
"Let your light
so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father
in heaven." ~ Matthew 5:16
Rejoicing
in Truth!
Carin
